Politics this week has been the gift that kept on giving. It could not have been more discombobulating (look it up) than if Justin Bieber had risen to power - or Donald Trump had become US President.
Those on the left were jubilant at having a voice and a principal conductor at last – although the 12 verses of the Red Flag with lyrics like ‘Come dungeons dark or gallows grim’ might grate at the Last Night of the Proms for an audience more used to ‘Happy and Glorious’.
For those on the right, it was like shooting fish in a barrel, but they seemed reluctant to really open fire. The fact is nobody really knows how this is going to pan out. Will scrum-half Corbyn let his inexperienced pack keep the ball and rumble forward, starving his multi-capped backs of any decent possession?
And what of Jeremy Corbyn from our perspective? First, he was born in Wiltshire and brought up in Shropshire, both strong farming communities (tick). His father, David, was an engineer (another tick) and inventor who in 1949 gained a patent for an “electrically operated vibrator apparatus” with his application stating that the strength of vibration “depends on the purpose for which the vibrations are utilised” (no wonder Corbymania generated frenzied excitement).
His brother, weather-guru Piers Corbyn, spoke to the AEA Conference in 2013, on his self-styled Solar Lunar Action Technique which completely rubbishes the impact of CO2 and carbon emissions on weather patterns (Sunday lunchtime might have been lively between the two siblings!)
Today his Shadow Cabinet includes a Health Secretary who he had apparently never met before, and a new Environment Secretary, Kerry McCarthy, responsible for food and farming who is a vegan and of the opinion that “. . .farting cows do irreparable harm to the environment” (according The Sun, who else?). She has spoken out against the meat, dairy and egg industries which “cause immense suffering to more than a billion animals every year”.
The NFU has adopted the diplomatic approach, President Meurig Raymond saying, “We look forward to working with Kerry McCarthy in her new role, and invite her to pledge her support to our Back British Farming campaign when we attend the Labour Party Conference” (presumably not over a Bacon and Egg McMuffin and milkshake combo).
Rather bizarrely, Jeremy Corbyn appeared on Radio 4’s On Your Farm recently and gave enthusiastic support to Prince Charles, whose family he has pledged to ‘put out of business’. He wanted to support small farmers and smallholders “crucial to the maintenance of food security”.
Dilemmas abound for politicians and business leaders in this new era of diametrically opposed politics. It is early days, and public opinion cannot always be judged accurately as we saw at the General Election in May. Then it was a ‘Buggins Turn’ choice to run the country. A generally accepted Plan A (magneta, mix of blue and red).
Today, one side of the House represents that Plan A, the other side offers Plan B in deep red.
So who’s now complaining there is no choice?